- Seven Deadly Stupidities
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- Relying on Family and Friends
Advice from family and friends often puts us in an awkward position. Think about it in terms of a logic equation:
· If you follow the advice and things work out, it’s a good outcome.
· If you follow the advice and things don’t work out, it’s a bad outcome.
· If you don’t follow the advice, someone will be upset with you and that is also a bad outcome.
While it certainly matters which family member or which friend provides the advice, only one of the outcomes works out in a positive manner. Nevertheless, most of us are dealing with the “advice” problem on a regular basis, especially if you are a young person who wants to go to college.
A generation ago, it was easy for a family or friend to help a young person get into a college or get that first job. A couple of phone calls, reminders of favors to be traded and Uncle Pete took care of it. Those days are long gone. There is now global competition for every admissions slot at every good college and for any decent entry-level job.
The proliferation of the information economy has made Uncle Pete all but obsolete. How many times have you heard that if you apply to Uncle Pete’s alma mater that his recommendation letter will be the “tiebreaker” should you be equivalent to other qualified candidates. Don’t buy this.
Admissions and hiring committees are under intense scrutiny because of the free flow of information that did not exist back in the day of paper applications and in-person interviews. Resumes, background checks, scrapes of social media sites, etc., are all a few clicks on the computer that all but make Uncle Pete obsolete.
Further, most advice from family and friends is unresearched and biased. I went to that college and things were great. Where is the analysis of majors, graduation rates, alumni success, etc.? Usually, there is none of it. So, it’s just a usually older (and therefor presumed wiser) family member or friend not giving thoughtful, up-to-date, and researched advice, but rather providing an opinion.
Not a good basis for a Tectonic Decision.
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